RELAPSE..I need help!

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Last seen: 7 months 2 weeks ago
Joined: 02/05/2018 - 21:03
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RELAPSE..I need help!
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From the age of around 9 i started to pull strands of hair out on the left side of my head and hid then down the side of the sofa, mum thought my hair was falling out and i never owned up and so that scared me enough to stop but 2 years later I started to pull my eyebrows out, not going to school because of how i looked then when I had no eyebrows left I started on my eyelashes only ever the upper lids though. It got so bad I made up a story so I could switch schools. I made a new life got a few weird looks but had good friends and life was happy but I still remained pulling. I've pulled continuously from 11 to 21. At 20 I left a toxic relationship and was happy again and I eventually just let them all grow back, with the odd episode of pulling but overall maintaining a set of eyebrows and eyelashes. I felt so good and normal again. I maintained for 2 years and started pulling the eyelashes again but that only last around 4 months and I've been in recovery since that. But now I'm 24 and I feel like the world is caving in around me,I have pulled literally every eyelash off of both my eyes, even the lower lids which I've never done before, I don't even get any relief from the bottom ones but my upper lids are so sore and swollen and bald that I needed some fix. I feel like I've just ruined another growth cycle and it's going to be months of baldness again. Any words of comfort or advice are really appreciated x

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Last seen: 7 months 2 weeks ago
Joined: 03/06/2018 - 13:22
Posts: 3

Hiii there. Have you tried anything to help stop the urge? Like mascara or anything?

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Last seen: 7 months 2 weeks ago
Joined: 02/05/2018 - 21:03
Posts: 2

Hi mama luigi, they are growing back atm but I find when I do have lashes and I wear mascara I'm picking the mascara off by end of the day and lashes are coming with it. It's a vicious cycle but I have abstained from pulling since publishing this post so that's good for me

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Last seen: 5 months 2 weeks ago
Joined: 04/29/2018 - 21:34
Posts: 3

I have tried all sorts of tricks hoping it will stop my pulling. I would wear gloves or play with something in my hand. I tried doodling and chewing gum and meditating. Nothing worked. The only thing that seems to help me is when I feel the urge to pull I imagine the pain instead of actually causing the pain physically. I equate it to self cutting. I believe I go to pulling to focus my thoughts to the pain. I don't think it is much different from a thrill seeker either. It is all about how my brain needs to obsess.